Dr. Julian Bashir: Of all the stories you told me, which ones were true and which ones weren't?
Elim Garak: My dear Doctor, they're all true...
Dr. Julian Bashir: Even the lies?
Elim Garak: Especially the lies.
--- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, "The Wire."
As you’ve undoubtedly noticed, Renal Failure is not your typical blog. Whereas most bloggers will write about what has happened in their lives or will straightforwardly give their views and opinions on whatever subject they feel like it, Renal Failure brings you wild fabrications and outright lies obscuring small hidden pieces of truth. If Renal Failure was an animal, it would be a cerebus, and its heads would be named satire, irony, and comedy. But it would say “Sandra” on its collar.
"So what I told you was true... from a certain point of view."
--- Obi-Wan Kenobi, Return of the Jedi

Renal Failure is a writing experiment that I started to get back to actually writing something. Now I use it to keep my mind sharp and frosty. Sort of going to a creative gym, where instead of weight machines and treadmills it’s formulating a blog post everyday about something I read or playing around with a half-baked idea in my head. So I guess that explains why I blog and how I blog in one swoop.
I’m not sure Renal Failure lends itself to creating a community. Tech bloggers tend to draw in the tech crowd. Blogs about living with abuse tend to draw in others going through the same thing. I write about drinking with a half-cyborg cat and a ninja. The only community I guess I could cultivate would be people who really like to laugh at absurdly funny things on a daily basis. And the best way to do that is I guess is just to keep writing absurdly funny stuff. I don’t get many comments, mainly because Renal Failure is a hard blog to comment on, or so I’ve been told. But I’m very thankful for the ones I get, because feedback is my heroin. And when I don’t get comments in a while, I see that dead baby crawling on the ceiling…
“The bullshitter is faking things. But this does not mean that he necessarily gets them wrong.”
--- Harry G. Frankfurt, from his book “On Bullshit.”
With so many blogs out there it’s my opinion that you really need to offer something really different to be truly interesting. Can you bring a unique viewpoint to something, or are you just typing stuff that can be found in thirty other places? Can you bring something new to the table? Is there another angle you can use to look at something? And I think a blog featuring stories about a paraplegic superhero and a lonely NSA agent tapping my phone does just that. Not all of us can be profound on a regular basis. Not all of us have interesting life experiences that can translate well into a written story suitable for sharing with the world. That doesn’t mean you don’t have anything to contribute, it’s just that you have to find something different to contribute or a different way of contributing.
Who I am isn’t important. If you look closely, you’ll see I’m never referred to by a name in any of my posts, or even in the About section. That’s on purpose because Renal Failure isn’t about me as a person; it’s about what I write. It is a writing experiment after all. That’s what I want the focus to be on (well, that and everything I write is a lie anyway, so would you even believe that’s my real name up there anyway? Probably not). Too often blogs become more personality-driven than content-driven, and it becomes more about the person writing the blog than what they’re actually writing. It doesn’t happen on purpose, it just develops over time. So this is my fail-safe against that.
If that last paragraph sounded very humble, it was only to lull you into this next point: Renal Failure can be very vicious at times. I did a three-part posting about
Forensic Vagina Specialists in El Salvador. One of the earliest posts was about Bernie the half-cyborg cat getting his human wife a coupon for a
hymenoplasty. Renal Failure varies from light-hearted silly stuff to cringe-inducing “that’s-so-horrible-that’s why-I’m-laughing-at-it” humor and everything in between. Sometimes going into unsafe territory can be very revealing and educational, other times it’s just plain fun. There is something undeniably fun about just not caring and going full-bore with something maybe offensive or potentially gross or that possibly will piss people off on purpose. Not that I do it all the time, but it’s fun every now and again and more people should try it.
I think there would be something wrong with the world if I got paid to do Renal Failure. Not that I would complain if I did get paid, but I would first say to the guy wanting to pay me “Really?” and then takes his money.
Now the question is… is everything you just read a lie?